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Summer Goals
85 replies
1889 days old
last post: Aug 9, 2018
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Summer Goals

71 Name: Anonymous : 2018-07-25 02:06
>>70

I never said that you're stupid or that you aren't trying hard. I'm sorry if my post came across that way, but it was not my intention.

But let's think about this. Why do you want to transition? Is it a grass-is-greener-on-the-other-side-of-the-fence kind of thing? Because you hate yourself and your current body? I'm no therapist, but you should try to accept and love yourself for who you are. Learn to be okay with your body instead of wanting it to be different. Do you work out? That could make you feel better about it. I knoe it's easier said than done though.

Instead of fixating on your perceived negative qualities (which might not be accurate -- maybe you're being too hard on yourself), take some time to think about your good traits. Positive affirmation might sound silly, but do it anyway. It can help a little. It won't magically fix everything, but it's better than nothing. Putting yourself down like you did in your post is counterproductive. Additionally, your traits/skills aren't set in stone. People can always get better at things. Reframing thoughts in a positive way can do wonders for motivation. I am not super buff or anything, but I still go to the gym, because I know that I will get results if I stick with it. By practicing at something I wasn't good at, I'm getting better at it, slowly but surely. Maybe you can practice positive affirmations and thought reframing. It might seem like bullshit at first but maybe you'll accept it over time.

Here's something to start you off: you said you are "unable to interact with anyone" but you're able to write better than a lot of people I know. You're probably good at other things too, but it seems like you don't have very high self-esteem.

I know these issues aren't easy to deal with, but please don't kill yourself. I'd be lying if I said I never think about that too (maybe for different reasons though). But even so, I think about help maybe the future will be brighter, and so I live another day. I am not always happy but optimism about the future keeps me going. I hope you can reach out for help and also learn to be okay with who you are.

Do you talk to a therapist about this? Or anyone else? Friends, family, etc. Ask a therapist about ideas for positive coping mechanisms when you're feeling down. I drink too and I know it's a problem. It's not like I'm perfect either. But try to look into more productive ways to deal with negative emotions.

Lastly, there's a saying someone once told me: "if you always do what you've always done, you'll always get what you've always got." Maybe not transitioning, but if you're unhappy now, you need to do something. If you stay the same, you will still continue to feel bad. Try different things. Not everything will work, but you have to try something. Weight lifting, painting, talking to a therapist, changing your diet, asking people you know for help and support (they can't read your mind and might not know what you're going through unless you straight up tell them), running, yoga, meditation, writing a book, volunteering, group therapy, whatever. It doesn't matter what it is, but you have to do something.

I do think you're cut out for life. I bet other people in your life do too. Don't say things like that.

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