8 Name: Anonymous : 2015-05-20 21:05
My life has really changed since the first day I stumbled upon the old ykkaria imageboard, I think. Especially my relationship with other people. I've never been much of a social person, but for two years or so I actively tried to avoid interaction as much as possible. I mean, I enjoyed being just by myself so why bother? It was peaceful, even if a bit uneventful, just wasting time on the internet, watching anime, reading and studying. It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, really. But there came a moment where all my tranquility transformed into a some sort of prison. I mean, I enjoy being by myself but after not talking to anyone for six months or so, not so much. It's not good to overdo things.
So after a month or so inside my "prison", I decided to stop being a hermit, if I could be called that. I repaired my relationship with my old friends, met some new people that I liked. And you know what, after all these years I realized people could be damn interesting. Not all the time of course, but it's those rare, little moments that are sort of magical. I still don't get along with most people, either they bore me or I bore them but I have some valuable friendships now. That's something, right? But sometimes I miss those times where I would just stay home for weeks. After a certain time, you get into a different mood, a kind of melancholic tranquility. I don't have the opportunity for that now. I'm planning on trying that again after my finals are over, but probably not. Something always comes up.
And it's just not the same anymore. I still check out my usual internet places regularly, but I don't really feel like actively participating. I don't think I can spend two or three days just browsing internet anymore, I get bored after a while. Anime is similar. I still watch 5-6 shows a season and I enjoy most of them to a certain degree, but since Ping Pong last year I haven't watched something truly worth watching, a 8 out of 10 show. Maybe I'll do a Aria or Tamayura marathon when I'm less busy for the new OVA for Aria and new movies for Tamayura.
One thing that has been nice is I started writing again after years. We opened a blog with a friend, not many people read what we write but it's nice just making a critique of our writings and chatting about literature. I reread Waiting for Godot lately and it made a big impact. After that I took up Endgame and decided it was the most beautiful thing I've ever witnessed in my life, Beckett became highly influential in how I thought and wrote. Oh, and I've been reading more philosophical texts than usual lately, with some touch of psychoanalysis here and there.