I've grown this insanely nihilistic, mundane viewpoint of existence. If you believe in god in a sense, you must believe in the opposite, such as satan, a consequence to a positive ( I think the word "God" is held in a good light). When you find yourself on this neutral reality area, you can only see things as one. Everything has felt pre ordained, fabricated, pre destined. You can only travel within yourself, outward enlightenment is void. A flat dead end road describes it well, there is no up or down, the feeling of being stuck. I feel we are all bound to this place in a rebirth cycle. My whole life I've been staring at a screen. I want to hope there is more though. People tend to group "hope" & " god " unanimously. They want to think that someone else can bring them good, or that they are powerless. I was never raised under a religious household, so take it with a grain of salt.